Sunday, December 13, 2009


As I made my way up the ladder to the fort, FYI, it was on 4 X 4 posts. I soon realized this was going to be a bit more commitment than I had originally anticipated. Is this a sign of what was ahead with the new blue house too, I thought? Yup, most likely. With a positive attitude, I wasn’t going to give up. My hunger to rid my property of this deformed shelter was far out-weighing my hesitation to let it stay. I continued climbing. My eyes scanned the interior. Black graffiti blanketed the walls. I need not enlighten you with the wording; and cigarette butts where scattered on the plywood floors. The spray can rested on its side near one corner of this hideous structure. I stood there for a second looking out onto the yard like it was an observation tower. Okay I thought, here goes nothing… I began slamming out the slotted boards that made up the perimeter. It wasn’t long until My neighbor heard my banging and yelled over the fence. She asked if I wanted a sledge hammer. Knowing a regular hammer most likely wasn’t going to cut it for the whole dismantling, I agreed.

I must add here that I had met these neighbors prior to buying my dream home. I forgot to put this info in a previous post so I’ll insert it here….
I had met them about three weeks after I’d lost the salmon colored house next to them and about a week after Rambo had shot down my first offer on his.
My oldest daughter, Megan (garage sale Queen) found out that there was a garage sale on my street of dreams. She had informed me of this right in the middle of me teaching my Saturday morning fitness class….by the way, she was not participating but was so excited she had to let me know. Apparently, the sale was comprised of the contents of the salmon stucco house. This sale was being held apparently, at the neighbors next door and not the original owners. Needless to say, I couldn’t wait to finish my class. I went to the sale right after, sweaty and I might add probably ripe. I pulled up in front of the house. Their driveway was filled with familiar furniture I’d seen a few weeks prior. I was excited. I may not be able to have the salmon house but I sure in hell was going to have a crack at purchasing some of the contents of it. Megan had already been there. She had first dibs on the treasures. She had also talked to my future neighbors so they knew who I was when I arrived. She had told them the story of my attempt to purchase both the salmon house and the blue house.
I quickly scoured the items and set aside the gems I wanted to purchase. I chit chatted with the nice couple about trying to get into their neighborhood. I told them I had put an offer on the blue house but that the asking price was just too much. The husband took both my hands in his and pleaded, “Please, please buy the blue house”. I chuckled quietly. We discussed Rambo in low tones. They seemed to dislike him. It sounded as though Mr. Blue house was not in the running for neighbor of the year. They also mentioned the huge dead tree between their property and and the blue house. It was definitely a sore spot for them. All in all I really liked them. It made me want the blue house more but I wasn’t willing to pay more than it was worth.

Okay, that said, lets get back to the “fort story”.
I made my way over to the fence between us to retrieve their sledge hammer. I asked them if they remembered me from the garage sale. Apparently, when the sold sign went up, they had asked a Realtor down the street to find out if I, the blonde woman, was the one who had purchased it. So indeed, the answer was yes, they remembered me. They informed me that when the sold sign went up on the lawn, Rambo stormed into the back yard and had a fit. He was screaming at the top of his lungs, stating he had been robbed. He had ranted on about how he could have gotten more money for his house (insert profanity here) and how he was going to take the (more profanity) real estate agent and the agency to court. Okay, this guy was obviously a bit more unstable than I had realized. They also began to enlighten me with some of the stories about Rambo and his family and they even said they had even considered pooling money with the other neighbors to purchase the blue house. Wow, how interesting was this? As these stories spilled from their lips, guess what my first thought was? Hmmm, let’s see…..GET MY BLOODY LOCKS CHANGED?!!
Hmmm, YA, THINK?!!!

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